Free downloadable resource at the bottom.
We all have some level of emotional intelligence, and it can fluctuate a lot. Generally, when we're stressed, anxious, depressed, or angry, our emotional intelligence (EQ) takes a hit. Interestingly, research shows that over the last 40 years, while our IQs have been going up, our EQs have been going down. This is especially noticeable among today's young people.
Emotional intelligence is about recognising, understanding, and CHOOSING how we think, feel, and act. It shapes how we understand ourselves and interact with others. In our personal lives, our level of emotional intelligence affects how we handle stress and conflict and impacts our overall mental and physical health.
The good news is that emotional intelligence can be developed and improved. We can become more self-aware, learn to manage our emotions and impulses, understand and empathise with others better, and navigate social settings more successfully.
Now, let's talk about digital emotional intelligence. This is all about understanding the impact our digital world has on our physical, mental, and emotional well-being and learning how to protect ourselves and others from harm.
Here are five useful starting points for conversations about developing digital emotional intelligence, along with a downloadable resource to work through with your child or children:
Self-Awareness:
Talk about the importance of paying attention to emotions while online.
Discuss how different digital experiences affect your child’s mood and behaviour.
Encourage them to reflect on their online interactions and identify patterns in how they feel afterward.
This understanding will help them manage their emotional triggers better. The free download at the bottom can assist with this.
Empathy:
Ask your child what they understand by the word 'empathy' and have them think about examples of empathetic and non-empathetic people they know.
Discuss the importance of practicing empathy in digital interactions.
Encourage them to consider others' perspectives and feelings and to be mindful of the impact their words and actions can have online.
Stress the importance of pausing before responding to someone who has triggered negative emotions and thinking,
“How would I feel if I received this?” A good rule of thumb is: if you wouldn’t say it to their face, don’t say it online.
Communication Skills:
Talk about the importance of clear and respectful communication in texts, emails, and social media posts.
Be mindful of tone and language to avoid misunderstandings or conflict.
Using ‘tone tags’ like (joking), (frustrated), (good), (stressed), (worried), (happy), (excited), etc., can help convey the intended tone and reduce miscommunications.
Digital Boundaries:
Discuss setting healthy boundaries for digital interactions.
Encourage your child to recognise when it's necessary to disconnect and take breaks from online activities to prioritise their mental and emotional well-being.
Talk about respecting others' boundaries and avoiding intruding on their privacy or personal space online.
Agree on specific areas in the house where digital devices aren’t allowed, like bedrooms or dining areas, and establish tech-free times, especially during meals, before bedtime, and during family gatherings, to encourage face-to-face interactions and relaxation without screens.
The key is to agree on these rules together, so they feel more involved and less likely to push back.
Critical Thinking:
Help your child develop critical thinking skills to navigate the digital world safely and confidently.
Encourage them to question the validity and reliability of online information.
Teach them to distinguish between facts, opinions, and misinformation, and to be sceptical of sensationalised content. Always verify information from multiple sources before accepting it as true.
By helping your child develop these digital emotional intelligence skills, they will be able to navigate online environments with confidence, empathy, and resilience, fostering positive and meaningful relationships in their digital world.
Use this free resource to help your young person do a digital audit on their usage and how it impacts them.
This TedTalk is very thought provoking and suitable to be shared with your teenager.
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